what if you had $10 million?

It's a fun game to play- what would you do if you had $10 million? Or $20 million or $30 million? It's one way of finding out if what you are doing RIGHT NOW is what you really want to be doing, or are just doing to earn money. But is it?

A good friend of mine is a therapist in Hollywood. He has counseled some very famous and very highly paid movie stars, including THE STAR, whose name I won't mention but who is one of the top earning movie actors in the world, earning in excess of $25 million a picture- and he's made lots of pictures.

THE STAR became very keen on my friend because my friend is a great listener and listened to THE STAR complaining about all the problems money brings: how he can't trust people anymore because he's not sure if they like him or his money. THE STAR also wanted to travel and my friend is well traveled. My friend had been to India a lot and THE STAR was very interested in going to Varanasi. OK said my friend, I'll take you. One day, out of the blue he gets a call. It's THE STAR. He wants to go to Varanasi next week. But next week is Christmas and my friend has his family and friends to think of so he says 'how about the first week of the new year?' But THE STAR, like most stars and all children, wants to party right now so he goes on his own to Delhi because Varanasi is like too much of a leap in the dark. He stays three days and comes home disappointed. He says he got scared and freaked out.

This guy is worth hundreds of millions of dollars. And he can't even go on holiday.

So how much do you need?

what if I'm just coasting?

Recently I received an email where I was asked, “You've mentioned the "Why didn't I do this sooner?" feeling after a lifeshift has been made.  I've had frustrations for years, and I find it amazing that I've coasted along for so long.  Things weren't all that bad.  I just couldn't think of any other alternatives.  Sure, I've had lots of micro-adventures along the way, and I was doing interesting things in my free time, but the problem remained - most of my time and energy was being spent on a job that didn't really fulfill my doing-something-really-meaningful needs.  A thought:  Is there some benefit to coasting along, or is it just another example of the laws of inertia? ... or is it both?”

I wrote that I'd done my fair share of coasting too. I think it's a good point that inertia could be mixed in with something useful too. One useful function of 'coasting' is to build up 'pressure' so that when you finally make the change you stick at it through the bad times. In Japan when they teach aikido they let you make the same error many times until they correct you- that way you remember it better and are more grateful. If a foreign teacher appeared they'd always correct straightaway and the student would go back to the old way the next day.

Secondly coasting can often be useful later, in unlikely ways. The time I spent driving a delivery van in London gave me good driving skills, a load of stories and material I later wrote about- so you never can tell. 

Having said all that, there really is never a perfect time to change, only a possible one. You can expect possibilities but expecting perfection is a little too much!

what if I don't give a damn?

I've been getting an increasing number of emails from people who have been inspired to lifeshift after reading what I have written on this site. I've decided to concentrate on providing materials for anyone who wants to do the same- change your life so that it is centred around what you want to do rather than what you feel trapped into doing.

The main issue for most in the modern age is the MONEY QUESTION. Many people would lifeshift if only they could make the 'same money' as they do in corporate skullduggery. But overemphasis, or undue emphasis too soon, on the money making side of a lifeshift is wrong. You need to find your 'passion' first. But what if you don't feel passionate about anything? I mean you hear those TV chefs going on and on about their 'passion for cooking' and you may think- hmm. I just don't care that much about anything.

This is the biggest secret of lifeshifting to put it in dramatic terms. No one cares that much at the start. No one pops out of the womb passionate about acting or daffodils or marathon running. All passion is, is addiction. Yep, the A word. Humans can psychologically addict themselves to anything (aided by physical addiction sometimes but not always) and this is what you tap into when you 'grow and nurture' your passion. You addict yourself. Sound bad? Well, that's the unvarnished truth of it. By doing something often, regularly and with interest you will become passionate about it. And this passion will improve your life, because any interest is like a light that sheds a little light on everything.

I'm not saying you have to become a bore- there is a difference. A bore is someone who lacks a sense of humour. Humour is the filtration process par excellance. It is a key way we sort the important and the useful from the useless. Humour is the way we connect to others, very often, and the bore lacks that ability. So growing your passion whilst retaining a sense of humour, is the way you develop a nose for what you need to learn and what you don't. It's the way you can foster an addiction to a new interest without getting buried by it.

Anything else on addicting yourself to a potential passion? Use your imagination- read everything you can on the subject, meet people who are doing what you want to do, search the internet for similar interest groups (though with a pinch of salt for the net bores in every thread), go on courses- a great way to increase addiction as you meet others with a similar growing passion, and finally look for ways to teach it to others- often the fastest way to learn.

go wild in the country

Time for a new header I think and recently I have been thinking about wildness- wild places and acting wild. Playing around with the idea wild means the opposite of tame- and tame means owned, imprisoned, rulebound. When you talk to some folk they actually think making MORE RULES will solve all the world's 'problems'. I went to a kid's party recently (easier to crash than the adult version) and there was a fifteen minute wait to get in- why? Because a couple of mums thought no one should enter without a ticket. But the party- for Halloween- was way out on the edge of town- you'd be mad to go there on the off chance of getting in ticketless- plus- an honour system where you showed your ticket (instead of being shaken down for it) would have worked just as well and 500% faster. Maybe two or three would have sneaked in. Big deal.

So, go wild. A bit wild. As you get older you get more staid. But when you're young it's no better- you live within a mental prison, things you can't conceive doing. Go wild- get the best of both worlds. Though there is a big attention factor in the attractiveness of deviant behaviour there is also a wildness factor. By building a bit of wildness into life you also straighten it out, so to speak.

Go wild in conversation. I find that if you can raise the stakes and make conversation a bit wild, a bit dangerous it gets a) a lot more interesting and b) you actually connect with who you are talking to. 

Go wild in the country. Instead of taking all the normal gear wear quick dry shirt and trousers and amphibious trainers. Aim to wade and swim rivers, plough up streams cross swamps and climb trees. Go without map or compass and find your way home using the direction of the wind, the lie of the land, the stars.

yang bandits

Ever known someone who actively likes you being a bit down, a bit subdued? These are the yang bandits, people out to boost their own yang by forcing yin type behaviour upon you. And maybe you've found yourself doing it, putting people down, subduing their energies? Yang banditry is rife in a world where the forces of yin are on the ascendent and everyone is trying to yang up wherever they can, unconciously often. 

life gets drained out of things

It is easily observed that the more something is repeated the more 'life' gets drained out of it. The energy and fun goes. So we hunt for new forms to provide a better vehicle for 'life'. Often we put the cart before the horse and think anything new guarantees more 'life'. But even a conversation can be a new form, or, rather, by being aware of life the new forms suggest themselves. I wonder if one looks for these manifestations they are potentially everywhere.

Of course a lot of the 'sparkle' of new encounters, of doing things for the first time is that the attention you get is better. The more a thing is repeated the less attention it usually provides. And 'lower quality' ie. less attractive attention.

By looking below the pleasant buzz of good quality attention, or looking around it, one can exert that special effort to inject 'life' into living. I'm going to try it anyway.

how to weigh your flight luggage at home

How many times have I set out for the airport thinking I may be over the weight limit? Just about every flight. Shouldn't I get special luggage scales- well maybe but then I'd have to fly with them and they'd be just...extra weight. Then my friend Mike Ivey suggested a brilliant idea that is stunning in its simplicity. Instead of trying to balance your sagging bag on a pair of domestic scales simply get on the scales HOLDING the bag. Then weigh yourself without the bag. Do the easy subtraction. So simple it's genius.